bad mum

from here - this pup makes me smile so much

Oh dear.....

I forgot to feed my babies! Lucky they are of the canine variety..... so not as drastic as human babies......

I feel so terrible, its 1015 pm.... I had my dinner ages ago.

Granted i have been ridiculously busy... but still not good enough. I need to get my shit together.

These very late nights and stupidly early mornings are taking there toll. I have had a migraine lingering for the last two days. Yesterday it got so bad i had the blurred vision, nausea, eyes and brain going to explode out of my head feeling. Horrid.

Thank goodness for strong pain killers.

I have so much i want to write but i still have a lesson plan to do. And my hair is resembling an oil slick.... truly disgusting. I can not ignore it any longer, i hate washing my hair.... really, really hate it. Hence it only happens once, perhaps twice a week. Yes its a little feral, but did i mention that i am busy...... tee hehe

I may also be a touch delirious.

A few little snippets of my week so far (two days...):

• 5 lessons taught (yes 5 in two days! yay me)
• i was so nervous before my year 12 biology class i had palpitations and an upset tummy...
• my supervisor introduced me to other teachers as her 'wonderful student teacher' - blush
• i got my second assignment back along with positive great feedback (feeling a little better about that 58% PASS i got... i cant be excellent at everything... right?)
• i had a flat tyre yesterday and a lovely stranger fixed it for me. Bless him!
• i am messy, really messy
• i miss my mum a lot this week (i had a freak out yesterday when she didn't answer the phone for a while, so i rang my aunty to go check on her... maybe a little over the top... she was gardening.... opps... over reaction?)
• my bro sent me a picture of my little nephew very proudly standing with three athletics ribbons pinned to his chests (1 x first and 2 x third). So PROUD of him. It made me really, really miss home.
• Tears..... lots of tears

I have three days of placement left, i hope i survive.

Sometimes i wonder why i push myself so much..... (almost to breaking point) but on the inside i know it is because i want to be able to say 'i did my best, i tried my hardest, i gave it all i had'.

At the end of the day no one really cares about what i have done, how busy i am or how much sleep i have not had. I need to please me, and my stupidly high expectations of myself.

Today i am proud of me, i did good.

Goodnight dearest peoples, sending you some love xx a